Monday, November 8, 2010

Still Alive!

   Well I'm still alive! Long story short, Shit happened and I felt like my whole world was just turned upside down. I kind of just went numb, and gave up on a lot of things. I guess I was depressed I think I still am. Only recently have I been able to work through my situation. Now I just feel guilty for letting people down. I stopped writing which is just a disappointment to myself, really. I also disconnected myself from friends and family. I use to talk to my sister- in - law everyday, and then I just stopped. I didn't call at all. It had nothing to do with her, just that I felt completely empty. I was consumed by my own drama, fear and despair. I miss talking to her soooo much, and now I don't even know how to call her up and say I'm sorry, for being such a crappy friend.  I did the same to my best friend, and now I'm trying to make a point of keeping in touch even if it's only an email.
   Anyways, I miss my blog. I miss my friends. I'm gonna try and do better.

Friday, June 4, 2010

Good Times Good Times

This past week has been full of BBQ's at Mom's house and pool time, and picnic's. Oh it was also my little guy's first time in the pool. He loved it!

Trying on Uncle Adam's hat.
This is Mark's idea of posing for a picture!lol.

Hanging out with Daddy.

First time in the pool! He was so excited.

He's just so cute!
Angie's crab walk race, at her Kindergarten Picnic.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

STUFF Happens!

I don't know how it happened, but somehow over the past six and a half years, we have gone from hardly any possessions to an apartment overflowing with STUFF. When my hubby and I first got married we lived in a 2 bedroom apartment that I shared with roommates. We were REALLY broke! Everything I owned fit into one bedroom. A full sized bed, a hand me down dresser, a $20 computer desk, and clothes. That pretty much sums it up. It wasn't until after my baby shower that I realized things were about to get crowded. All of a sudden this kid who wasn't even born yet had more furniture and gadgets then both her parents combined. It's amazing how much stuff you can accumulate when you have kids. Then once those children can walk those things are always all over the place. Add in a few more kids and my home looks like it's been  struck by a hurricane daily. Hurricane Angie, Hurricane Mark, and Hurricane Alex! What I have realized lately is that it's partly my fault. My kids have more toy's and STUFF then they could possibly need or play with. We actually have huge Rubbermaid containers full of toys sitting in our closet. Oh and more in our little cubicle in the shared storage room of our apartment building. I know it's crazy right. Toys in storage it's ridiculous. then there's the baby clothes, maternity clothes, walkers, baby swings, and just all the other crap we have accumulated through the years. In the beginning we were too broke to buy all the things we wanted or just random stuff you pick up thinking you need. Well once things got a little better, we got loser and loser with the money. Now we have a million things that have no real purpose but to take up space in our home. It's really frustrating, especially when your the only one assigned to clean it all. So today I'm thinking about simplifying. I'm looking around and realizing how much of this stuff we could do without. I think I have a pretty good yard sale waiting to happen. I'm sick of STUFF! How about you?

Friday, May 28, 2010


This is my blog, my place to be me, to let it all out. It's as safe place where I don't have to be self conscious, embarrassed, or ashamed. It's like having a diary or a journal only better because sometimes your journal actually talks back to you and gives you words of encouragement, advise or just tells you your not alone in this. No my blog isn't private anyone can stumble upon it and read my inner most thoughts or what Cloth Diapers I love. By the way I'm loving Rumparooz right now, : ) Yet even though it's out there it still felt private, I felt anonymous. I have always been the kind of person who was afraid that if I let it all out, if I let myself be me without any filters that they wouldn't like me. That they would look at me different, they wouldn't be my friend or they would talk about me behind my back. Motherhood changed a lot of that for me. I gave up caring what other people thought, or I thought I did. I realize I still hang on to that fear. I'm still afraid, I'm still holding back. I realize this because when my hubby decided that it was a good idea to announce to his whole family that I had a blog, I was MORTIFIED! I couldn't believe that he did that after I made it very clear that I hadn't told anyone, and wasn't ready to share it with them yet. I refused to talk about it when my Brother in law asked about it. I just got this image in my head of everyone sitting around the computer reading my blog and laughing at me. Not really warranted but that's what flashed through my mind.  a few days later my Sister in Law was wondering why I hadn't told her about it since we pretty much speak every day. The truth is it's hard  for me to put myself out there with people I know. Sometimes there are those things that you just don't say out loud, or that your embarrassed by or that you think no one else will get, so you keep it to yourself. Before everyone knew about my blog I thought this would be a great way to find the motivation to get rid off all my baby weight. I couldn't wait to join in on McFatty Mondays, so I could be part of this great support system and be accountable, because you know Mondays gonna roll around, and you don't want to be caught with a twinkie in your mouth! Since my Hubby burst my blogs plastic bubble, I have not had the courage to go for it. All of a sudden the idea of posting my weight on here with pics just didn't sound like such fun anymore. Yeah I know I'm a chicken, but it's the truth. It really has nothing to with anyone else and everything to do with my own lack of confidence. So now i find myself trying to let go of that fear, and just be me, and not worry what anyone else thinks about it.
 So how about you ladies, do you prefer anonymity or are you an open book in life as well as your blog?

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Playground Bully

We had a really beautiful day outside yesterday, Perfect for a trip to the park for the kids and some BBQ! My two oldest were the only 2 playing for a while, then I saw him. Lol. I know what to expect when I see this little guy coming. He's only 3 but he is a force to be reckoned with. Funny thing is his dad is nice as can be. We always have very nice conversations as we watch our kids play. The only problem is that, the kid is kind of a bully. Not like outrageously bad, but pretty darn naughty! He like to throw dirt on other kids, and a lot of times those are my kids! He also like to throw things at people. in the half an hour I was there, he threw a candy wrapper, a ROCK, and my own kids bubble maker at me. The bubble maker did hit me. He also kept picking up my daughters stuffed Webkins toy and throwing it in the dirt. Each time that his dad caught him he tried to tell him to stop or apologize but that was about it. The little boy never actually apologized just looked at me and ran away. I'm not mad or anything, he's just a child but it does irritate me when parents let there kids run wild, or bully other kids with no consequence. I'm not saying I'm perfect but I would never let my child dump dirt on someone else's child, and not do something about it. It kind of blows my mind actually. It kind of makes me want to grab my kids and run home when I see them walking towards the park. I'm sorry but I just don't like picking wood chips, dirt and pebbles out of my kids hair when I get home! Has anyone else had trouble with bully's? How do you handle it? Or gasp, is your child a bully? Hehe.

Thursday, May 20, 2010


I just thought this was hilarious, and thought I would share. Our mini van is now the swagger wagon!
Find More Free Layouts at April Showers